A DOGS THOUGHTS: WHAT THE....?!!!

A Dogs Thoughts: What the ....?!!!
Yelling at me for barking.
I'm a dog! That’s what we do.

Taking me for a walk, then not letting me check stuff out.
Exactly whose walk is this anyway?

Any trick that involves balancing food on my nose.
Would you eat something that someone had put on your nose?
Then, making me wait for it; that’s just pure torture.

Any haircut that involves bows or ribbons.
Now you know why we chew your stuff up when you're not home.

That stupid fake throw when playing fetch.
So you fooled a dog! How clever are you?

Taking me to the vet for "the big snip" then acting surprised when I freak out every time we go back!

And this is surprising because?

Getting upset when I sniff at your guests.
Sorry, but I haven't quite mastered that handshake thing yet.

Dog sweaters.
Hello??? Haven't you noticed the fur?
From: The Canine Chef at www.thecaninechef.net/expert-opinions